Why I quit social media

by Edwin Finch, 10 March 2025

Here's the makeover of my Instagram profile.

On the left, you have what the top of my Instagram posts used to look like. On the right, you have what my profile looks like now.

After much reflection on my relationship with technology, I've made the decision to completely stop browsing and posting on social media.

At the end of the day, it really comes down to a single question.

How do I want to spend my time?

The life I seek to live is simple on the surface, yet challenging at its core.

My three priorities in life are to:

Share deeply intimate, trusting and resilient relationships with my family and friends;
Train my mind to be calm, flexible, and open;
Pursue a fulfilling career path that is of benefit to myself, my family and those in my broader community

For a while now, I've been increasingly driven to focus my life on these priorities. I am no longer willing to waste my time on things and people that cause more harm than good for these ideals.

As it turns out, social media was severely damaging the quality of my relationships, my mind, and my career, while bringing virtually no benefit.

In my relationships, social media made me more self-conscious, impatient, and judgemental. It was also pulling me away from time that could instead be used to truly connect to those that matter most, via in-person and phone calls.

My mind felt ceaselessly buffeted by distraction, increasingly anxious, and addicted. I would compulsively check my socials, with no purpose other than to get my next "dopamine hit" (as the kids like to say).

Finally, my education and career were being stifled because I was unable to focus for long periods of time. Infinite feeds presented an always-available and easy temptation to avoid the challenge of work by instead browsing pleasurable, desirable, or otherwise distracting posts.

...and so with all of that harm from social media, does it really make sense to keep using it?

Questions for the spell-bound

One of my favourite words as of late is "disenchanted": to break free from a spell or illusion.

The gravitational pull of social media is most certainly a spell that has been unknowingly cast upon many of us. We have somehow come to believe that they are tools for good, and that we have control over these tools.

How much of a tool was I to once believe this myself?

Luckily, in my experience, asking myself just a few challenging questions was an effective way to disenchant myself and be set free of being a tool.

Here are a few of the questions that I asked myself over the course of a month or two:

1. Is social media making me a more compassionate, empathetic and curious person?

(Tip for an accurate answer when asking yourself: if you thought yes to this question, then ask yourself how you feel about the supporters of a certain political party. Did you know that social media is intentionally feeding you content that reinforce your already existing beliefs and divide you from others who hold opposing ones?)

2. Do I feel closer to my friends and family because of social media?

(In specific regards to scrolling, liking and sharing posts. Using messaging to schedule time together in-person or on calls is a noteworthy exception to this question.)

3. Why am I really posting, and what am I seeking from these posts?

(Is it possible that I have an ego seeking to craft a good-looking image of myself for others?)

These are good to ask yourself, but in reality, they are actually softball questions. There is a fourth question, which is a tad drastic, but its raw honesty had the largest impact for me.

It's the question of how I want to use my very limited time on this earth.

Let's do some simple arithmetic:

I am about 27 years old at the time of writing this. Assuming I will live to 80, that means I have roughly 2,750 weeks left on earth. If that's not short enough, one third of that time will be slept away, which means that if I am lucky, I have more like 1,800 conscious weeks before I die.

Given how tragically brief life really is, do I want to spend a single second of my time scrolling or posting on social media?

When I really asked myself this, it rattled me to my core and made it evidently clear that there are much better ways to spend my time. There are quite literally at least a million other things that I could do which would actually lead to a more fulfilling and meaningful life for myself and those around me.

Exactly none of those things involve flicking my thumb on a piece of glass designed to squeeze every second of attention possible out of me for profit, through platforms filled with attention-seeking people looking to gratify their desires, and distract themselves at every turn.

Instead, I could enjoy visiting my family. Grab coffee with a friend. Pick up garbage on the street. Help the homeless. Listen to music laying down with my eyes closed. Push myself in exercise, or meet new friends by joining a club. Learn to play an instrument. Cry. Read a book. Meditate. Become more articulate. Make pancakes for someone I love. Touch grass. Go outside and walk for an hour with no specific destination.

This list goes on and on; and it's things like these that I plan to spend my limited time on now.

Changes for disenchantment

In light of this startling discovery of my brief time, and the fruitlessness of being on these manipulative platforms, I've made some changes:

I made the jump to the Light Phone (and before that, my iPhone had almost every app deleted off of it, and most of its notifications turned off. I also turned off raise-to-wake and tap-to-wake. These tiny adjustments massively decreased my habitual phone usage!)
I deleted all of my posts on social media, installed Chrome extensions to hide their feeds, and do not plan to post again. Also, hiding YouTube's recommended videos has been massive for stubbing distraction out
I have streamlined all messaging from social media accounts using Beeper, and check it once a day on my MacBook. Anyone that wants to reach me faster than that can still text, call or email me

Making these changes was not as difficult as I had feared. The biggest thing is that I miss sending memes to my mom & brother on Instagram, but luckily I can easily make up for this by just making more jokes with them in person :)

I am now soaking up the positives that started rolling in just a few weeks after I began this journey. These are just a few, but there are certainly others that I haven't listed and likely more to come that I haven't realized yet.

I feel much calmer, less anxious, less self-conscious, and not so addicted
I am slowly but surely regaining my attention span. I can read a book for an hour straight for the first time in my life!
I feel the desire to distract myself steadily decreasing
I have more random conversations with people and find it easier to just spontaneously call a friend when I want to chat
I don't have to think about maintaining some kind of image or presence for my ego. I can just be who I am with whoever actually shows up in my life

In short, I'm way more present with myself & others. Could one ask for more?

Even with all of these changes, I still plan on having some form of online presence. The goal is not to become a ghost.

You can still stalk me

I know how important it is to try and vibe-check someone online, and my moral postulating about technology does not make me exempt!

In lieu of social media posts, here are a few other ways that you can get an idea of who I am and reach out if you'd like.

Browse my website
Check out any recent posts on my Telegram channel
Read other posts on my blog
Mull over my goodreads reviews
Become a viewer on my LinkedIn
...or, just shoot me a good ol' fashioned call, text or email (all contact info can be found on my website)

Inviting you to a more examined life

I sincerely thank you for taking the time to read this post. I hope that it inspires you to live a life that fosters deep wellbeing for yourself and those you love.

I invite you to challenge yourself with the questions shared here, so that you can do exactly that.

May you live a long and meaningful life; one full of what matters to you, shared with the people you love.

~ Edwin Fernando Finch